Half a Month There on Foot

Cutted

2007-04-09T17:04:00.000-07:00

Next time, explain "shorter" in relation to hair.

Fuzz in the afternoon

2007-03-26T19:13:00.000-07:00

Well then. Somebody forgot to post. For like three months.

I got really tired of just talking about media I was consuming. And we may have shot a TV concert. Or two. Then there's Christmas, birthdays, food poisoning, business decisions, and everything in between.

But now I have something to type about. It's a typical three-act structure, with an overly-long falling action.

... it might be multi-parted. But there'll be pictures.

----------------------

In 2004, I loved 'Shaun of the Dead.' It was my FAVORITE movie of the year. I loved the mix of actual romantic comedy with actual zombie movie, billed by filmmakers Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg as "RomZomCom." I marveled at the progression these guys from 'Spaced' (see: "Second Favorite TV Show of All Time" post somewhere in the archive) had made from TV to film. Great movie.

And now we have Hot Fuzz. I've been anticipating it since the title was released. The initial release stateside release date was pushed back from February to April.

Except... for sneak previews. In the United States. Starting in March.

And the first showing was in Washington, D.C. at the Arlington Cinema N Drafthouse.

What follows is the story of what would be the best time I've had at the movies ever.

...without making out with a girl.

Mr. B.

2006-12-19T05:24:00.000-08:00

Joe Barbera died.

A lot of us grew up watching the same cartoons, and most likely the first, alongside our Looney Tunes and Merry Melodies, were Hanna-Barbera.

Click below and read some great obits and anecdotes from animation writers, lovers, and fans.

http://www.cartoonbrew.com/

http://kingofbreakfast.livejournal.com/46739.html

http://www.newsfromme.com/

Woo.

2006-12-11T19:05:00.000-08:00

In celebration of having a big project being shot and being home before 10 p.m., here's movies I love that film snobs will be upset about. Not quite so bad they're good, but some are kinda close:

'Real Genius' - the best Val Kilmer movie? I think so. And so should you.

'Anaconda' - Jon Voight versus a giant-ass CGI snake with Ice Cube trying not to swear. And Keri Wurer is fun to say. But maybe not to spell.

'Executive Decision' - yeah, you know what? F' you. It's awful. But there's some Kurt Russell. And if it's on TV I watch it.

'Tango & Cash' - Ah! Kurt Russell! Again! Woo hoo!

'My Science Project' -shut up Bryan. You konw you love it. And anything with Fisher Stevens.

' Tremors' - Fred Ward. Kevin Bacon. Michael Gross. And Reba. Fighting Tremors. With dynamite.

' Cry Baby' - I've seen it through once, but I watch it if it's on the TV. Is John Waters even bad? Is he beyond bad? Anti-bad?

Johnny DC & models? I'm there

2006-11-24T09:59:00.000-08:00

Wow. I've been pointed to Device via Graeme from Newsarama's blog.

Design, illustration, logos, film, fonts... Rian is good. Like scary good. If you like fun, smart design, check it out.

It’s a great thing to be 81 and in love.

2006-11-21T20:08:00.000-08:00

I've enjoyed the Altman movies I've seen. I was looking forward to his fictional version of 'Hands on a Hardbody.' And I'd like to have a few word written about me by Garrison Keillor:

"Mr. Altman loved making movies. He loved the chaos of shooting and the sociability of the crew and actors --- he adored actors --- and he loved the editing room and he especially loved sitting in a screening room and watching the thing over and over with other people. He didn’t care for the money end of things, he didn’t mind doing publicity, but when he was working he was in heaven.

He and I once talked about making a movie about a man coming back to Lake Wobegon to bury his father, and Mr. Altman said, “The death of an old man is not a tragedy.” I used that line in the movie we wound up making --- the Angel of Death says it to the Lunch Lady, comforting her on the death of her lover Chuck Akers in his dressing room, “The death of an old man is not a tragedy.” Mr. Altman’s death seems so honorable and righteous --- to go in full-flight, doing what you love --- like his comrades in the Army Air Force in WWII who got shot out of the sky and simply vanished into blue air --- and all of us who worked with him had the great privilege of seeing an 81-year-old guy doing what he loved to do. I’m sorry that our movie turned out to be his last, but I do know that he loved making it. It’s a great thing to be 81 and in love."

– Garrison Keillor

Skip to the end

2006-11-20T14:56:00.000-08:00

If you didn't like Shaun of the Dead then I never loved you. A shotgun AND three pistols: Simon, Ed, and Nick lovingly make an English Michael Bay movie?

... doesn't matter. You had me at"You're scared of mice and spiders, but oh-so-much greater is your fear that one day the two species will cross-breed to form an all-powerful race of mice-spiders who will immobilize human beings in giant webs in order to steal cheese."

Casino Royale

2006-11-19T16:16:00.000-08:00

Good. Glad I got to see it. And now that I've seen this and bought the big action set piece during the theater, but now I dig it even more.

Love the Bond, though not nearly as much as Amy. When I asked her if she liked it, she sort of purred and wanted to be alone. Daniel Craig is too pretty to spend two plus hours with.

SW 11.02.06

2006-11-03T18:26:00.000-08:00

Dandelions plucked. Wine glasses, inhibitions: empty.

SW 11.01.06

2006-11-01T17:58:00.000-08:00

Ah, that's the niche: postal workers.

SW: 10.31.06

2006-10-31T05:22:00.000-08:00

Oh rock, you always fail me.

Six-Word Samurai

2006-10-30T05:42:00.000-08:00

Machine. Unexpectedly, I’d invented a time
- Alan Moore

Wired had this idea, and I think it's genius. Therefore, I'll run it into the ground for as long as I consistently remember to post. I'll not stick to just science fiction either.

I really love the Alan Moore story.

Today's from me: "Sunrise. At least I'm not dead."

WTF?

2006-10-27T11:45:00.000-07:00

Seriously?

Gilmore Girls vs. Planetary OR Warren Ellis' own Rory

2006-10-26T18:13:00.000-07:00

Who would've thunk seven years ago a TV show about a mother-daughter relationship would go toe-to-toe with a comic book written by a crazy Brit and illustrated by the most handsome man in comics (he's dreamier than your Patrick Dempsey, ladies) for my affections on a Thursday morning?

-------------------------------

I'd fallen in love with Buffy. Not the SMG, as Amy/Jen/Jay/you thinks, but the show. I really really loved it. I was enjoying a fairly downbeat summer and found the a show that said, quite literally, high school is hell. And after that, yeah, it's can still be hell. But if you're dedicated, have friends, and written by really funny writers then you'll get through it.

... okay, Sarah Michelle Gellar had a little something to do with it. And a few years later she was guesting on another WB show called "Gross Pointe." Only I thought it was called "Gilmore Girls." And it wasn't.

Instead, I watched an episode of a show about a mother and daughter who behaved more like sisters. And there was a bitter and cynical guy with a ball cap who owned a diner. And a fat gay guy who wanted to run the town. And a dance school. And Kirk. And it was really really funny. And the story was well told, guided by some woman named Amy Sherman-Palladino.

------------------------

Seven years ago I didn't know who Warren Ellis was. I vaguely knew he was a british comic writer who... swore? Drank? Swore and drank? He had a comic called "Planetary" coming out with John Cassaday (yeah, that guy who did that Western comic). It should have just come off as some kind of launch that would burn for a few issues then peter out due to lack of interest or the creative team moving on.

But there was something about the tagline: "Strange world. Let's keep it that way," and then "Archeologists of the Unknown." I was intrigued.

So I bought the first issue. It started off with a diner in the desert. The next shot is of an old waitress walking towards an old man in the white suit. "How's the coffee?" the waitress said. "Tastes like dog piss," the old man in the white suit said. The waitress said "Dog has got to go somewhere."

That does not read like an opening line of a bad comic.

--------------------------------------------------

I'm done watching Gilmore Girls? Why is this important? Because for the last seven years I've told people to watch. Friends, enemies, strangers, loved ones... all to ridicule, disbelief, and distrust.

Until you watched. And listened. And came to the Dark Side. Or the Friday night dinners.

Come on, when the show was firing on all cylinders it was on par with the best comedy and drama on TV, blending the two effortlessly in a sea of Preston Sturgesesque language. Fiction that, in lesser hands, would've teetered into camp or melodrama, but instead achieved something... more. And Amy Sherman-Palladino is of the show she created.

And now it's a bad cover. It's hollow. It's all the same actors and some of the same directors and musicians, but the show's creator is gone. And none of the leftover or new writers can make it sound like she's still there.

Planetary, however, had it's penultimate issue. And I loved it. With all the success Warren Ellis and John Cassaday have earned over the last few years, Planetary has gone by the wayside. It's not creator-owned, but it's kind of like Neil Gaiman and Sandman:nobody but Neil Gaiman does it because it's his story to tell. Planetary is Ellis and Cassaday (and Laura DePuy, now Laura Martin on colors).

Planetary works because it's two stories: the story of Elijah Snow and his quest to preserve the knowledge of the world, to catalog the strange, to ensure that there's a tomorrow to come. And it's also exploration of genre and style, not a cheap cover. It's a love letter to time periods and ideas, a dissection of times and places by a thoughtful, curious kid. Who is drunk on whiskey and weird goth porn. I thought for sure the series would have a few clunkers in there (alright, the 70s/new agey/botany/world harmony issue is just weird) but it never failed to surpass my expectations.

I really didn't have a lot of expectations with either of this "entertainments." Sure, Planetary hasn't amassed more than a little over two years worth of monthly comics since '99 while Gilmore Girls has gone through seven seasons, five and half incredibly entertaining seasons.

Planetary still has an issue left. I wouldn't drop it the way I'm done with Gilmore Girls.

Sometime down the line Ellis can unearth Gilmore Girls and remind me that it was entertaining. Of course, he'll make it x-rated and weird, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Intergalactic Planetary #26

2006-10-21T09:36:00.000-07:00

Planetary will be ending next week. There's an epilouge that follows in #27, but next Wednesday we'll get an ending of sorts. I've been waiting for this since 1999, and at the same time I want this series to keep going for years to come.

From the Wikipedia link: "The idea of the series is to create a concise world in which archetypes of superheroes, pulp fiction heroes, science fiction heroes, and characters from just about every possible mass media format, live in one large universe while the Planetary team investigates them and ties together the ends. As Warren Ellis said in his proposal for the comic series: "[W]hat if you had a hundred years of superhero history just slowly leaking out into this young and modern superhero world of the Wildstorm Universe? What if you could take everything old and make it new again?"'

Planetary has been an exploration of popular culture in comic form. Ink on paper disecting Victorian-era adventure magazines, Chinese martial arts movies, sci-fi movies from the 50's, radio dramas from the 40's... Ellis and Cassaday fit a ton of stuff in 26 comics, all while creating something completely original while taking apart our shared past.

I am going to miss Planetary like I've never missed any other entertainment.

Will direct for food

2006-10-09T16:13:00.000-07:00

Terry Gilliam is probably the reason I have as much interest in movies as I have. No foolin'. I was in the right place a the right time, and Gilliam put me there.

So if it plays here, I'll see Tideland. Not so much the Brothers Grimm, but this looks much more Terry Gilliam.

You asked for the butter.

2006-09-25T20:26:00.000-07:00

Well, Studio 60, tonight was more like it. A little less preachy, a little more funny, a little more story.

Perry and Whitford are almost too good together, especially when Whitford summerizes Perry's previous decade of comedy delivery with one sentence. Seeing the little drama Perry gets to play with in this episode alone almost makes me want to go back and see if I missed something from the Friends show. Almost. I totally bought him. I forgot it was Matthew Perry for a few minutes.

And use more Timothy Busfield.

80 minutes in, and I'm with you.

Gary's Got a Boner

2006-09-24T17:26:00.000-07:00

... is the song that should be played tomorrow by Paul Westerberg and Tommy Stinson at the Open Season premiere tomorrow. Instead it'll be something from the movie, which will be, you know, appropriate and all.

I downloaded Love You in Fall from iTunes and I think Tommy is singing backing vocals. There are few songs on the Open Season: Songs of Paul Westerberg soundrack that just sound very Replacements.

But this is the first time the two will have played publicly together in... 15 years? And, as Paul points out, all the elements are right: "We get back together to open up for a cartoon, in front of a bunch of people who never heard of us," Mr. Westerberg says. "That's fitting."

Love you in the Fall

2006-09-14T09:33:00.000-07:00

Unattainable love? Check. Taking a cliched lyric and turning it upside down? Check. Metaphor for life/death/regret? Check.

New Paul Westerberg.

It's almost too 14 Songs. Almost too much production, but it's THE big make-or-break movie for Sony animation. I can understand why as a business move you make it a little more universal/family friendly.

If ONE person gets into The Replacements because of the soundtrack, I'll be stoked. If there's one snippet I enjoy as much as "seasons change before me/after me there'll be someone new" I'll be stoked.

Some six year-old is going to hear music from the man who flipped off my girlfriend. Punk'd.

Some days we do good

2006-09-14T09:14:00.000-07:00

Bionic arm provides hope for amputees.

Chris Colombus discovers he hates America

2006-09-05T06:10:00.000-07:00

Don't ask why, but I was looking at Chris Columbus' bio on IMDB and found this: NFL Dad right after I read that Zach Braff had halted production on his planned directoral follow up to Garden State called Open Hearts, an adaptation of a Dutch drama detailing a car accident and it's affect on the people involved.

I remember when Columbus at least made sort of original stuff, like Goonies or Gremlins. Was Home Alone II the warning sign?

Split-second chances

2006-09-04T18:56:00.000-07:00

I sent out two e-mails today with pictures of the house Amy bought, and included some shots of our office and one of me looking like I'd aged and had a pretty significant weight gain. I wrote some nonsense about showing off the house and not gaining a pound since I was fifteen in the first e-mail, then brief descriptors of the photos in e-mail number two.

I told my mom I'd sent some photos to her, more of an exercise of her having to actually check her e-mail herself. Her computer is fairly slow and is apparently having RAM issues so she called to see if I could walk her through getting the photos to show up.

Doing 99% of my work on Macs, I'd forgotten the joys of Outlook Express and had mom read the options to me. In doing so she read my e-mails aloud.

What is it about having people who have known you all your life read things you said to you? For a split second I was happy to hear her say my words and in a blink I was embarrassed that I hadn't written a better e-mail.

Houses other than Hugh Laurie

2006-08-31T11:05:00.000-07:00

Amy is now the proud owner of a house. I am the proud participant in paying a mortgage on a house that Amy owns with my name on one or two pieces of paper.

Amy's out of town this weekend, so raging kegger at the new digs. I mean, we'll be cleaning anyway.

Flea and Tech check

2006-08-20T11:12:00.000-07:00

The VT shoot was really fun. It's a haul down to Blacksburg, but the coaches were great. Beamer walked in and literally said "Okay, what're we doing?" You could feel his schedule, I mean it had mass.

We were in the off-campus bookstore which was filled with freshmen and their parents, as well as returning upper classmen (Tech dudes, by the by: inconsiderate douche bags. The moms are bad too, but the gals and the dads seemed pretty considerate). Anybody with a phone or camera phone took pictures of Beamer and the other coaches and some lame skinny guy who hadn't slept in days looking extra goofy holding a clipboard, stopwatch, and wearing headphones with a 16 foot cord.

The spot should be compelete mid-week, and I'll post a link. Ryan did most of the shooting, I did most of the directing, and I think he'll do the final edit, so we'll see. It's commercials like these I wish we could have multiple versions of the same spot. Ah, collaboration.

I should point out that Al Bloch, the sales exec from ComCast, used to play in a number of bands, including Concrete Blonde. He knows The Posies, who played in Big Star with Alex Chilton. That's like three degrees from Alex Chilton. And one degree from Concrete Blonde.

Lots of fun.

50 in 50 in 50

2006-08-19T19:20:00.000-07:00

Wow. This Matt, is why we run: "What drives someone to run so far? He says it is about getting back the attention that came after the storm last August 29.
http://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gif
"The reality is there is just a huge need still down there," said Thompson. "It looks today as it did a year ago. A lot has been cleaned up, but at the same time if someone went down there for the first time they would think the storm hit yesterday.'"

Well, this is probably the real reason: "There wasn't much left of the Nissan Altima that night, when Sam Thompson almost lost his ability to run, the night he could have died.

He was 17 when he hydroplaned on a rain-soaked road in Mississippi and another car slammed into his, leaving him with a shattered leg and pelvis, and a broken jaw and collarbone.

Doctors told the cross-country runner his left leg might heal shorter than his right and he would never run again. They placed a titanium rod in his left leg, stretching from his left knee to his ankle, to help him walk."

Check out Sam's site here and the CNN story here.

This is my single, this is my jingle

2006-08-19T14:02:00.000-07:00

Ladies and gentlemen, we're close to new Paul Westerberg songs:

"On the heels of their surprise reunion to record two new songs for the recent Replacements best-of, Paul Westerberg and Tommy Stinson are together again on two songs from the "Open Season" soundtrack, due Sept. 26 via Lost Highway. The animated film, which features the voices of Ashton Kutcher and Martin Lawrence, opens three days later.

The album includes 10 Westerberg originals, of which "Love You in the Fall" and
"Right to Arm Bears" boast Stinson on bass. One Westerberg track each is performed by Pete Yorn ("I Belong [Reprise]") and Deathray ("Wild As I Wanna Be").

"Open Season" is rounded out by Deathray's "I Wanna Lose Control (Uh Oh)" and the Talking Heads' "Wild Wild Life." The score was penned by Westerberg and Ramin Djawad.

Westerberg first broke the news he was making a foray into film scoring in a 2004 Billboard.com interview. "I wouldn't like to do that as a regular job and do five movies a year and all that, but it's a viable ... alternative to touring," he said."

I've gotta admit, Lawrence and Kutcher are not names that get me in the theater, but I'll be there in September.

... are you keeping count? That's like twelve new Westerberg/Replacements songs in a year! I mean come on!

Put me in coach

2006-08-18T12:03:00.000-07:00

My new favorite ACC Women's Basketball Head Coach: Beth Dunkenberger. Coming from a guy who is as bad as basketball to disappoint his mother enough to bring it up at least once a year, that's saying a lot.

During our short commercial shoot with the Virginia Tech coaching staff, Dukenberger made reference to her dad giving her coaching tips that she ignores and did interview schtick from Talladega Nights. Plus, you know, her name is really funny.

Go Hokies

2006-08-17T12:42:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow we're shooting a spot with Virginia Tech football coach Frank Beamer arranged by Concrete Blonde's bassist.

How funny is my life right now?

In a New York minute

2006-08-16T05:34:00.000-07:00

Brian K. Vaughan and Tony Harris, writer and artist of Ex Machina (first issue available free here), were asked to contribute to New York magazine. The subject for the issue is "What if 9-11 never happened?"

The caption reads "September 11, 2006: Sitting at his usual table at Windows on the World, former mayor Rudolph Giuliani dines alone, unnoticed."

It's hip to be Hipp!

2006-08-13T19:18:00.000-07:00

My love affair with The Amazing Joy Buzzards continues with Dan Hipp's blog! You get an free 8-page story from the Image Christmas Special! Hipp's art looks good in color or black and white.

Great Sid Caesar's Ghost I love me some ABJ!

Next year you'll be number one, America!

2006-08-11T10:44:00.000-07:00

... in not understanding science.

You are Number Twelve (Monkeys)

2006-08-11T06:22:00.000-07:00

From Variety "Christopher Nolan is in talks to do THE PRISONER with a script by David and Janet Webb Peoples."

I really like Nolan, and the Peoples have written/adapted two my favorites movies in Unforgiven and 12 Monkeys.

Of course, this is all thumbing your nose at god at this point. It's the prisoner. This needs to make people riot.

I've never seen a cat that acts like a dog

2006-08-10T18:13:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday my mom put our cat of fifteen years to sleep.

Technically, she was my cat.

Some how, legally, the cat's name was "Sweet Baby," which is patently ridiculous. Some how I changed "Sweet Baby," to "Butt Butt," which is slightly less ridiculous to me.

I get how people really love pets. My earliest memory questioning my Judeo-Christian upbringing dealt with some Sunday School teacher explaing to a group of us that pets wouldn't be with us with heaven because they didn't have a soul. What the hell kind of "heaven" doesn't have your dog or cat or horse or hamster or lobster?

My house was rarely without at least a cat and a dog. Our typical configuartion was two dogs and two cats growing up. And four horses (which are often included in the stream of names when my mom yells at/for me: "Prince... Robyn... Blaz... Joey!")

You can see she had a little smudge of black on her nose that reminded you of Chaplin or Hitler, depending on her ear position. She was about twelve lean pounds, spending a lot of summer nights outside.

Out of all our animals, there was something unique about Butt Butt. She was so un-cat like. She was chatty but not lippy, affectionate but didn't need to sleep in your lap, and she behaved like a dog. She would team up with the golden retriver to chase away other dogs. She followed you to the mailbox, stood back from the road, watched you get the mail, then walked the fence back with you while you seperated the junk mail from the bills.

Technically, she was my cat.

I went to college and took Finn, a cat from an ex, with me, a refugee of my mom's dislike because her fat, fluffy cat "Pretty Eyes" ("Fatty" to you and me, and it should be obvious by now that despite other abilities I may have, animal naming is not always spot-on *coughBigDogcough*) hated Finn and would attack her on sight. And in the house the world revolved around that fat, lippy cat. So Finn got to live with me in a small closet on Patterson Street.

When Bill started dating my mom, he was pretty straight-forward with his feelings on cats: didn't like 'em. "Hate" is too strong a word, but "dislike" is pretty good there. He and mom used to split their time between houses and cities, and when Bill sold his house and moved to Raphine, he got all the animals too. Including Butt Butt.

The transformation from smoking, Harley-riding, workaholic to the Bill we knew must have been just as jarring as his afinity for Butt Butt. She pretty much adopted him and became his cat, though he was more or less her Bill.

And he wasn't shy about telling you either. "That cat is more like a dog! I've never seen a cat like her." Didn't mean he liked cats, mind you, just meant he liked her. Mom would always point out how much Butt Butt favored Bill over her. "Follows him in the mornings, stays with him while he" and then filled in the blank with whatever project Bill was working on at the time.

Bill, ironically taking care of the animals, died that snowy morning in February while feeding the horses. The morning was such a rush of activity and emotion I didn't ask mom if Butt Butt had been with him, but I'd guess she was.

Mom struggled with the decision to put her down. For the past few months, Butt Butt ate less. She was still just as active, but losing weight. It had been three weeks of not eating.

Last week we got the diagnosis: renal failure. Up until Monday, mom was going to try medication and treatment, which would have meant shots, IV, and special food. Thing is, mom had been trying EVERY kind of food for the past three weeks, and all Butt Butt would do was drink a little milk. She was literally wasting away and was eating less.

I saw her the weekend before last and she acted the same. She meowed at me, raised on her hind legs to meet my hand. When I saw her I asked her if she was eating. She rubbed my leg and lied to me, because she was that kind of cat.

Mom struggled with the decision to put her down. I would've to. It's hard to kill one of your best friends. It's even more difficult to lose another piece of the big puzzle that is your life, to have that section of the board go grey. We're moving into winter again, and that might mean another horse will die. Winter means another February is close.

I've always dealt with animal deaths much more publicly than I have human deaths. It's funny, I hit a point in college, that I began to celebrate where and how I grew up. If friends came with me to my mom's house I was stoked to show off the mountains, the horses, how big our garden used to be, and my cat that acted like a dog.

I'm taking a second of right now to say I had a great little cat.

Technically, she was my cat. You would've liked her.

Drop your weapons, you are surrounded by armed bastards

2006-08-09T17:47:00.000-07:00

I've got a new Brit show I'm digging, hep cats: the BBC drama Life on Mars

It's on BBC America, and I'm only one and one-half episodes in of the three episodes broadcast here in the Colonies and I'm hooked. Here's the premise: Detective Sam Tyler's partner and girlfriend is abducted by a serial killer. Minutes later, Sam gets hit by a car... and wakes up in 1973. Confused. And hating his clothes.

Sam is pretty sure he's A. dead B. crazy C. dying D. in a coma. His colleagues are cigarette smoking, face punching cops who aren't sure why the hell he's acting so strange. The case the '73 detectives are working on seems like it might tie into the 2006 case he was working on...

It's a nice balancing act of bits that make you think he's desperately trying to get out of a coma and get back in 2006, and it really is all in his head. Probably.

Sam has to figure out how to be a cop thirty-three years before cell phones and forensics are common place. He can barely get a crime scene closed much less life a print after a robbery. All his tech, standards, and procedures are gone, and all he has left to rely on is himself and a bunch of drunk cops who'd rather beat the shit out of him than let a perp off when there's no evidence.

The direction is really really good, the editing is top-flight, the color palette is all over, the acting, especially by John Simm (playing Sam) is really interesting. I wonder if Simm has a comedic background like the kick-ass Hugh Laurie rocking out the confused/scared/bright/driven/angry/funny/sad "man against the world."

I think the DVD set of the first season will be available in the States by the end of the year, and if you're looking for something to try in the ol' NetFlix que I really think Life on Mars is worth a look. I didn't even mention the soundtrack of the show... man it's good.

Tuff Enuff

2006-08-09T16:46:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, as I was transferring some files and listening to an
audio interview with the creators of the Berenstein Bears (Harper
Collins has a ton of interviews and I'd already made it through Neil
Gaiman and Elmore Leonard), our work neighbor RaShaun "Snuggs"
Stovall walked in with former WWE wrestler and TV host Maven, who is a gigantic
man.

Jeremy (web/graphics guy) knows Maven from ten or so years ago, church and softball and they had a nice ten minute catch-up session. After Maven and Snuggs
left Jeremy filled me in with Maven's TV and wrestling career. And now
Maven hosts a show on BET.

My day was odd out of the gate, and it's still getting more strange. I
was one degree from Florence Henderson. And apparently someone named
"The Undertaker.

Birthday city

2006-08-09T06:34:00.000-07:00

Today is chock full of birthdays:

Emily Williams (emily_gpsy160@yahoo.com) is at least 21 today, and I'm sure Team Williams will not let her sleep any more than usual. Happy birthday Emily.

And my shorter half is also at least 21. I've kicked things off by buying the wrong size yoga ball. The dogs and cat bought a much better card than mine... happy birthday Amy, Maven has your date all planned...

Master Bruce, what happened to your mustache?

2006-08-07T17:36:00.000-07:00

Ran tonight.

Distance: 2.2 miles

Speed: even without the watch, way below average

Things that didn't work: legs, lungs, knee

My knee discomfort didn't kick in until 1.75 miles, and even then I could keep moving. The biggest problem is my lungs reverted back to their 29-years of counter-intuitive breathing. I spent most of the run trying to get the breathing back on track. My pace was fine and the legs remember, but the lungs have had a few months to revert back.

So many problems, and such a good time.

Running isn't like writing: I enjoy the act of running and having ran. And now that I've written my 50 words, I enjoy... well, having run.

Welcome to Diggnation

2006-08-07T03:48:00.000-07:00

Remember when I wouldn't shut up about podcasting a year or so ago? Remeber when I was all "This Week in Tech is awesome and the most awesomest" and I'd give a rundown of the people like Kevin Rose and Digg?

Business Week is mentioning Kevin again, and he don't have $60 million. He doesn't actually have $60,000. The new TWIT has a great seven minutes with Kevin and the TWIT team discussing how the article misrepresents Digg, got Kevin to pose for the ridiculous photo, and Dvorak goes so far as to call the piece a hit piece.

C'mon people, when I'm fixated on something it's either really really cool or comic books, we all know this. What? Oh yeah, maybe Sarah Michelle Gellar. Okay, and Dr. Pepper.

... yeah, a little too much John Cusack. I get it. Shut up.

Vulgarathon: RIP Bob Thaves

2006-08-05T06:37:00.000-07:00

Bob Thaves was always hit-or-miss for me, but in a world of Garfield and Family Circus, I'd at least groan at his stuff. Regardless, I always enjoyed his art and his brand of humor.

Vulgarathon Day 2: Give us the money, Lebowski

2006-08-03T18:44:00.000-07:00

You Tube doesn't want me to post here right now... so click here for the two minute version of The Big Lebowski.

Thatsa aspicee metaballa!

2006-08-03T05:25:00.000-07:00

Slice of New York is my favorite pizza blog, bar none. And one of my favorite food blogs in general. Go and learn about pizza, pizza in NY, and maybe a little something about life.

But mostly pizza.

Vulgarathon: Day One

2006-08-01T18:49:00.000-07:00

I'm changing it up: instead of thinking about a bunch of random posts of things I forget to write about, I'll stick with a theme. And that theme is... vulgarity.

Sometimes I have to loop around Court Square to get to and from the office. If you've been downtown, you probably know Hole in the Wall, your friendly neighborhood porn store. I seem to be one of the few people I know who hasn't been in Hole in the Wall, and I'm not looking to pop that cherry any time soon. A couple of the Downtown Players (not Shirtless Guy and Son, Other Shirtless Guy, or Snuggs) are usually outside the store in the afternoon, out, you know, gettin' it done. In front of the porn store.

Yesterday, post 10 a.m. haircut (I tried it after 7:15 but would've had to wait 45 minutes) I saw a group of four kids(including one girl) in front of Hole in the Wall, which was still locked, replete with bars.

One of the dudes who hangs out in front of HitW, Long-White-Haired-Guy-Always-in-A-White-Tee-Shirt-and-Blue-Jeans, was just getting to his section of wall as a HitW staffer was rolling back the bars. LWHGAWTSBJ looked at the kids like they were impeding on his territory. I felt their awkwardness from two lanes over.

It struck me: the kids might be waiting to get into HitW. At 10 in the morning! And again I was struck: who buys porn in the morning? Really?

If you're buying porn, I'm thinking it's, at the earliest, a mid-day kind of thing. Does anybody really want Ass Babes 5 at a time when Regis is on? And why the hell aren't they ordering porn off the net?

Usually, during my 7-noon time, I'm pretty productive. I like some music, some podcasts, and I try to get the time-sensitive stuff done first. I don't think porn would be a good thing at this time, and I certainly wouldn't want to wait on the dude to open the store. You can still get Playboy at the 7-11 (or Barnes and Noble I'd guess) so you could get your naked ladies that way.

I don't really have an out here. It's too late to be cogniscent of anything other than wanting to see some naked chicks...

I'd like to solve, Pat

2006-07-31T08:05:00.000-07:00

I'm declaring blog bankruptcy. And declaring that I should probably spell check "bankruptcy."

I've alluded to anecdotes, wanted to write stuff I haven't, and gernally have been not making with the words. But I'm declaring blog bankruptcy. If I can get to the anecdote, I will. I'll stop feeling the guilt that I haven't told you about the Right On Band or the baby bird rescue. Not that you wanted to know, but I wanted to figure out how to communicate it to you.

Stupid work...

They aren't booing, they're just saying "Dave"

2006-07-24T19:57:00.000-07:00

Just fired up Letterman from last week while I do some stuff. They're doing a bit with a bunch of sight gags like "Celebrity Pool Water" and "Ben & Jerrr's Backyard BBQ ice cream." He got to an poorly executed, lame "contact lens sunglass thingy" and after the lukewarm audience reception they cut to tape of Kevin Eubanks, Jay Leno's bandleader, laughing and rocking in place.

Some nights The Late Show reminds you of how good they can be.

Update: special "Justin Baker" edition

2006-07-19T19:15:00.000-07:00

Q: What's funnier than watching me stumble through a dap handshake with a 7-foot tall former JMU men's basketball power forward I've met twice, ending in a hug?

A: Watching Ryan stumble through a dap handshake with a 7-foot tall former JMU men's basketball power forward he's met twice, ending in a hug.

2006-07-19T19:04:00.000-07:00

Color Me Impressed

Never saw this live, gotta live it through muddy video on YouTube.

Kevin Smith vs. Joel Siegel

2006-07-19T18:21:00.000-07:00

Shark Tale: A Halibut Good Time.

C'mon, did Bubba make this big a scene? OR Born Again (minus Frank Miller)

2006-07-18T20:40:00.000-07:00

http://www.crooksandliars.com/posts/2006/07/18/presidential-groping/ Really? This isn't doctored? None of it?

Right, swearing, I get that. But: mouth full, whiney, and now gropey? Forget "Demmiecrats want to give all the money to the winos and druggies and let men marry livestock" and "Republicans want to destroy all life as we know it:" this guy really is a drunken frat boy. Can't we at least unite against druken frat boys?

I'm going to go out and conveniently find Jesus during my tenure in public office...

No signal to no noise

2006-07-17T19:10:00.000-07:00

Due to the economic pressures of my very extreme rare china dolls collection (re: owning a business and being a participant in a house-buying plan) I'm fluxing about my entertainment future, specically:

Do I drop all of cable? Do I keep basic cable? Do I get a satellite dish and tune into free channels? Drop everything and get NetFlix again? Find stuff online?

... sadly, some of these options kill my head-clearing Halo 2. Well, it's sad that I'm bullet-training to 30 playing Halo 2, but still.

On my mind...now! Right now! Now!

2006-07-17T19:00:00.001-07:00

- Rob Liefeld is a nut

- downstairs A/C = Halo 2 playin'

- macaroni coulda been cooked longer

- can't remember who I was supposed to give that estimate to tomorrow

- displeased that the combo drive died in this PowerBook

- Elkton Town Council meetings are just as goofy as international summits

Double A, M-C-O

2006-07-14T05:32:00.000-07:00

I'm running through Season 3 of Curb Your Enthusiasm and rembering why I love it: Larry David against the world.

Really? Pirates?

2006-07-12T06:32:00.000-07:00

I've read accounts of kids dressing up as pirates for the new Pirates of the Carribean movie, and my first reaction was "Will Kiera Knightly still be less pretty than Orlando Bloom?" followed with "Huh."

I like that the kids are putting forth the effort. But my first thought was "Am I that freakin' out of touch?" I applauded the goofy, geeky fun of the father and son with towels around their heads at the Hitchiker's showing. I wanted to beat the crap out of any guys I've ever seen in Star Wars outfits. But I was perplexed by the pirates and their popularity... until our web manager Jeremy expressed his confusion by the new Pirates movie shattering all box office expectations and being, what like the Number Onest Number One Movie of All Time?

Jeremy hasn't seen the first Pirates, and truth be told, he ain't interested. He doesn't go in for a touch of fantasy or sci-fi, something that's slightly off center. Unlike Amy who can be coaxed over to the side of "Yeah, this probably isn't going to happen, but it's a pretty decent story" from time to time, Jeremy is not that guy, that's not where his tastes lie. Which is perfectly valid way to be.

Except I will never understand it. Most people, maybe they dig fairytales. Or maybe they're hardcore SF fans. Or maybe they'll watch zombies get the crap kicked out of them because it's a condemnation of a society so hell-bent on materialism and capatalism that it doesn't see when it starts to cannibalize the very principles it was founded to protect and cherish. Plus it's cool when zombies get blowed up. Stories with an inhereit improbability, a lack of "this could happen" framed around a good story.

You may love The Princess Bride and Star Wars but not give a hang about Lord of the Rings. Maybe The Matrix leaves you cold but Raiders has you giddy and clapping like a school girl. I submit: Pirates is a success because of three letters: j-o-y.

Joy.

The first movie is a story about a young woman freeing herself from societal, famial, and contextual bonds. You've seen the movie, yes, the first one? Yeah, Jack wants the Pearl, Will wants Elizabeth and to know his place in the world, but the catalyst, the pump-primer is beanpole Knightly. Even when she's not full acutalized, she's pretty much there. And her actions have a sense of joy.

Johnny Depp's Captain Jack is nothing but freedom (or want of freedom) personified. He exemplifies the pirate lifestyle (there's much to made arguing Sparrow's real place in the story and his demi-god status as the aider and abetter to Will and Elizabeth but I'm already running late). Sparrow owns and operates in the joy of living and breathing.

Yeah, it's got great actors, good effects, great pacing, superior direction and a stunning color palette, all adding up to these little girls putting on pirate outfits in Small Town USA for the 1:30 p.m. Sunday showing. J-o-y. That's what I'm saying.

Which is not to say the new Pirates is the same as the old Pirates.
That review is forthcoming.

HUGE SPOILER FOR THE MOVIE FOLLOWS THIS LINE. STOP READING IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO SPOIL THE MOVIE FOR YOU.

Really? I'm going to spoil the movie.

The only moment of pure joy I remember from Dead Man's Chest is Jack's death scene. No, after the Kracken snots on him: "Hello beastie," then we get that spectacular shot as the music swells and Jack raises his sword, running TO death. He knew it was coming, and in that moment he still had confidence (confidence being the not the abscence of ambiguity or doubt but choosing to face it head on expecting the best possible outcome) in himself to meet certain death head-on. Jack is flawed, for sure, but his character is about being free and making choices, refusing to believe there are no more options, willing options into being.

With no other course of action available to him, Jack meets death with the same zest and joy he met life.

Jeremy would say that movies are not places to "learn" "life lessons." If somebody walks out of the theater contemplating their personal follow-through when staring death in the eyes, I'd say that's pretty decent food for thought from a movie produced by Jerry Bruckhimer.

Pirates of My Pants

2006-07-12T06:29:00.000-07:00

A pirate walks into a bar. He has a steering wheel down the front of his pants.

The bartender says "Hey, what are you doing with that steering wheel in your pants?"

The pirate replies "Aarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"

Now HERE'S the best movie of the summer

2006-07-09T19:38:00.000-07:00

Hot dog!

On track?

2006-07-09T19:20:00.000-07:00

Freein' up some time, getting back on track. Probably.

I am looking for a dare-to-be-great situation

2006-06-28T06:12:00.000-07:00

John Cusack turns 40 today.

I think in my 13-year old brain, that has great significance. Lloyd Dobbler is 40.

... I'll need some time with this. In the mean time, I direct you to the following: Being John Malkovitch, Grosse Pointe Blank, Better Off Dead, One Crazy Summer, Eight Men Out, The Journey of Natty Gann, Serendipity, High Fidelity, and, of course, Say Anything.

"Kickboxing. Sport of the future."

I'll need some time with this.

Newest four-issue mini series idea that should be dropped right now:

2006-06-27T06:29:00.000-07:00

Okay, stay with me: Mad Max... on lawn mowers.

See, it's post-apocalyptic so people are growing their own food again, and farming is do-or-die. And these guys, they're giant combines for hire. They show up to town, barter for fuel and food, and thresh the corn. Except, you know, with bad guys.

...shut up. If you could see the imagery in my head you'd be on board. And issue three when they attach the blades to the guy and... fine. What do you got?

Texas style

2006-06-26T20:50:00.000-07:00

If you're tired of crappy TV that makes you feel like you're not learning, may I suggest crappy TV that makes you feel like you're learning? Texas Ranch House is being re-run on our local PBS station, and it's a fine addition to the line-up of the "BLANK House" series.

This one had me cheering in the last episode, since the "antagonists" are so easy to dislike. Fairly straight ahead stuff: a family is the "ranch" family working with the "cowboys" in for three months in an 1800s style setting. The rancher has to deliver 200 head of cattle at the end of those three months and sell them for profit.

This version had lots of likable folks and stupid and funny. The show passes on a lot of PSBesque info and it's pretty entertaining. Any time I cheer at the TV and mock others it's gotta be a weiner, right?

In which we touch base again

2006-06-20T18:19:00.000-07:00

It's been a week, blog. I can't believe how behind I am on you. I mean, what are you going to think about TV shows I like? About things I thought of and didn't follow through on?

I know, I know. There are plenty of entries started and stopped. You don't want any more of those half-hearted attempts, and neither do I. But I'm busy. And tired. So very tired. But also busy.

I owe you the story of the open house. I owe you the saga of the baby bird. And I owe you Memorial Day. And I'll get to all of them.

Soon.

New/Old Replacements TODAY

2006-06-13T08:48:00.000-07:00

Blogger didn't want me to remind you earlier, but you can get new/"best of" The Replacements today.

Their hometown paper said: "The Replacements were a great band, but they weren't so great that their legacy can't be messed with. A decent new Replacements song recorded last December is a lot more fulfilling than yet another spin of "I Will Dare," no matter its magic."

And Entertainment Weekly said this: "... the first Replacements anthology to span their entire career still makes the point that few indie (or non-indie) rockers shredded their throats like Paul Westerberg, and few did so in the context of more poignant or uninhibited songs. Many, including the Goo Goo Dolls, ripped off their sound, but few approached their soul."

Here it is.

T-minus 1 day

2006-06-12T06:19:00.000-07:00

One day till the new Replacements album streets. C'mon, you got Color Me Impressed (it's the Joey funeral song), I Will Dare, Skyway, Left of the Dial... plus two new songs.

Put away your Good Charlotte and your This Indie Band is Awesome And Has Messy Hair and listen to one of the most influential bands of the 80's. And then go buy Tim. And Pleased to Meet Me. And Let It Be.

Countdown to new Replacements

2006-06-11T17:00:00.000-07:00

In two short days you can buy new/old Replacements. In stores. Online.

Do it. You know you're tired of your Brian McKnight and Christina Aguilera.

Net Neutrality

2006-06-11T16:16:00.000-07:00

"The House voted on legislation yesterday that could determine the future of the internet and public access television in this country. In a vote of 321 to 101, the House voted to pass the Communications Opportunity, Promotion and Enhancement Act, known as the COPE bill. This controversial telecommunications legislation would permit phone and cable companies to operate Internet and other digital communications service as private networks, free of policy safeguards or governmental oversight. The bill would effectively end what is known as “net neutrality” which is the concept that that everyone, everywhere, should have free, universal and non-discriminatory access to the Internet. The bill would also cut back the obligation of cable TV companies to devote channels to public access and fund the facilities to run them. And the COPE bill would replace local cable franchises with national franchises."

C'mon, really? It's this far? Really? Go here and get some info and get involved.

Get thee to the Googleplex

2006-06-09T05:45:00.000-07:00

Two movies I want to see open on the same day, what a freakin' rarity:

Cars

A Prairie Home Companion

Ironic that one is a celebration of "fitting/not fitting in," a fish-out-of-water story told with the people making up the technology, and the other is the swan song of an older medium mixed with oral storytelling and song on its way out. John Lassatter is arguably moving into his prime helming Pixar and taking over Disney animation, endeavering to update Disney by returning to story. Robert Altman is 81, examining life and death, and working on a borrowed heart.

It's a good weekend to go to the movies.

Free swag! Woo hoo!

2006-06-06T12:04:00.000-07:00

Dude, Mandy Amanos sister Kat just e-mailed me to say she's sending me a free comic.

Everything's comin' up Joey today! Take that IRS!

The One Where Paul Westerberg is in NewsWeek This Week

2006-06-06T09:34:00.000-07:00

There's too much work and not enough time to read.

Go here and read an interview with Paul Westerberg where he reveals there are more songs recorded than on the new "best of" The Replacements album called Don't You Know Who I Think I Was? (you non-fans are buying this one, right? Because, well, you need it like you need air). Paul is also the coach of his sons baseball team, which is the coolest thing I've read all day. This article appears in the NewsWeek on stands now, and covers a lot of good territory in a short bit.

CNN.com ran a story about The Bangles and The 'mats that's worth a read too.

And, and, apparently The Old 97's make an appearance in The Break-Up. Sadly, I semi-want to see the movie now. They have a "best of" album coming out too, which you also need, unless, of course, you have their catalog.

What a frickin' great month for music.

1 minute of podcast fame

2006-06-06T09:03:00.000-07:00

I made Cinecast baby! I mean Filmspotting! You may want to listen to the X-Men 3 review first, then the latest episode at about 26ish minutes in.

In your face Richmond and Baker! Who's the man dog now, Dogman?

Radio radio

2006-06-04T16:32:00.000-07:00

I've been listening to podcasts for well over a year now, I guess. I just discovered a great new one today, so I thought I'd hit you with a few that I really dig:

TWIT As part of Leo Laporte's podcast empire, the anchor show with over a quarter million downloads per episode is still going strong. This McGalughlin Group of technology news and issues is what got me into podcasting, and it's still the show I look forward to the most. The other Radio Leo shows are great too, but this is the first.

Filmspotting Formerly Cinecast, recently renamed Filmspotting is where two guys talk about movies. Sam, the production manager for Ira Glass' This American Life, and Adam, a former film reviewer and college radio DJ, get together and offer reviews, prizes, and a top 5 list. Smart, literate, and usually pretty self-effacing, Cine...Filmspotting is a listen I always look forward to.

Wordballoon Emmy-nominated sports reporter John Siuntres talks comic books with a whole range of people makin' 'em. Insightful, loose, and smart conversation that deviates from comic talk to movies to art to TV. Wordballoon needs a website facelift, but it's a great show I always look forward to.

They Might Be Giants One of my favorite bands putting out FREE and rare tracks from their catalog. A great way to get your name out there, a great way to make me realize maybe I should buy more live shows...

KCRW's The Treatment Elvis does Hollywood. Elvis Mitchell interviews people in film, TV, books, and popular arts. I love the Elvis interviews, especially when it's a guest that excites him. He's like a Terry Gross, except just about movies and stuff, and you know, hip and a film critic and not a small white woman.

The Animation Podcast Animator Clay Kaytis wants to preserve, inspire, and educate animators and animation fans alike by interviewing current, past and future masters. I came away from his Glen Keane interview loving The Family Circus (Bill Keane is Glenn's dad). Each episode (they're pretty sporatic) is a gem.

Creative Screenwriting The show I just started listening to that prompted me for a quick link round up. It's Q & A sessions with screenwriters from actual movies that are in actual theaters. Informative, interesting, and filled with spoilers, I'm digging the two episodes I've heard.

Those are a few of the shows I like. If you have a computer you can listen to podcasts. iTunes is a free download and will let you subscribe to anything (most podcasts are 100% free) and Podcast Alley is a great place to look up shows.

Links for the linkless

2006-06-03T18:58:00.000-07:00

I'm fighting a stupid summer cold by playing video games and watching the good X-Men movie.

In the interim, I encourage you to read the non-pro and pro links there to the side, with special attention to News from ME and Neil Gaiman's Journal. Both these guys have been typing away some interesting stuff lately, especially Gaiman.

Happy Summer Time Fun Show

2006-05-31T05:34:00.000-07:00

Alright, the two accurate words in that headline are "Summer" and "Show." Dennis Leary and Peter Tolan's Rescue Me kicked off the third season on the FX Network last night, and you should do yourself a favor and watch the 13-episode season. The series got off track last year, and has the potential to collapse under the weight of its large cast and B, C, D, E, and oh yeah, F and G plots, but damn it's funny and tragic and angry, and ultimately compelling.

Be advised, there's lots of swearing, lots of sex, and an equal number of adult and juvenile themes (did I mention anger?). All these elements work the way they're supposed to work (most of the time) and a show about some of the most tragic human beings on the planets is one of the funniest and brutally honest.

If you have a chance, I like the first season over the second. Of course, it's a linear story so the second is kind of necessary for the overall story. The first episode has one of my favorite end sequences ever, even if it sets up the "music montage" trend the series continues through the latter episodes.

Great writing (usually) and a great cast. And it's got some of the best cold opens I've ever seen. So set the TiVo, figure out when the reruns air, and watch Dennis Leary self-destruct. You'll almost forget he did Demolition Man. Almost.

I still want a retconned Rosario Dawson as TC

2006-05-30T05:38:00.000-07:00

Ah, Tom Selleck, why don't they leave well enough alone?

"Selleck Dashes "Magnum" Hopes"

In honor of summer

2006-05-29T16:02:00.000-07:00

Here's a piece from the bestus director ever, Micheal Bay. It was originally published in The Onion:

"What Has Our Society Come To When March Of The Penguins Is The Blockbuster Hit Of The Summer?

I've been a major Hollywood director for a long time, and I thought I'd seen it all. But I can't help wondering what's happening to the entertainment industry—indeed, to our entire society. Where are our standards? Our values? For fuck's sake—our cultural priorities? I simply cannot accept that March Of The Penguins is the big summer hit everybody's talking about. Hello?

It used to be that a summer blockbuster had to have brutal violence, sexy women, breathtaking action sequences, adrenaline-pumping high-speed chases—at a bare minimum, some explosions. But sitting through that penguin movie, I couldn't believe my eyes. Where were the big set pieces? Hell, this movie didn't even have sets! Has anyone ever heard of production values? It's one of the most vital aspects of the filmmaking art, and you don't get it by just showing up on an iceberg and filming whatever happens to be in front of you. Frankly, for real icebergs, they looked fake. This film is an insult to the great men and women who spend countless hours in front of computers creating incredibly realistic CGI icebergs.

Does no one out there care about these things anymore but me? Am I a lone voice of sanity crying out in a universe gone mad?

What kind of a world do we live in when a futuristic techno-thriller starring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson as escaped clones on levitating jet bikes doesn't outgross the shit out of a glorified Discovery Channel rerun? Don't people realize how much money I spent? How many people it took to bring that vision to the screen? Do people realize how many rewrites and punch-ups we went through? I paid my writers millions of dollars, and they were some of the best in the biz. You know who wrote their script? A bunch of birds.

Where was the villain? A story's not going to keep an audience on the edge of their seats without a strong opposition. Where was the second-act turning point? You've gotta have that moment when the hero's at the end of his rope and the bad guy looks like he's going to win it all. And where was the love story? Stars have to have real chemistry that smolders on the screen to make a summer blockbuster one to remember. Okay, the penguin movie had mating cycles, but that's not love. Is it all about sex to these animals?

Speaking of which, I think we can all agree that the penguins in this film gave some pretty wooden performances. In many scenes, it was impossible to tell them apart. Maybe if they'd moved the camera once in a while, I could have gotten more emotionally invested in what was going on. For Christ's sake, there was not a single crane shot in the whole movie!

I remember a day when the public appreciated fine cinema. In that lost age, it made sense that my important historical drama Pearl Harbor had a fighting chance for at least a special-effects Oscar. Best sound, no question. But now, in this crazy upside-down, topsy-turvy world, I hear that—guess what?—the only summer movie getting any Oscar buzz is a static, near-silent documentary about waddling, flightless birds!

These days, I guess old-fashioned values like "megawattage," "high-octane thrill rides," and "explosions" just don't matter anymore. Well, I call that a sad day for American moviemaking.

I'm busy in pre-production planning my next big spectacle (which no one will see because they'll be off watching a 10-hour documentary on park squirrels, no doubt). But if you are in the San Diego area, do me this favor: Go to Sea World, walk into the emperor-penguin exhibit, and punch one those fuckers right in the face. Tell 'em Michael Bay sent ya."

God bless you Micheal Bay, and thank you for all the explosions, bad physics, and paper-thin plots.

X-Men 3 OR I smell a Ratner

2006-05-27T17:28:00.000-07:00

A few random thoughts on X-Men 3: The Last Stand:

The comic dork side of me:
- wait, what?
- I'm sorry, that guy did what now? Really?
- yeah, I don't think that's a good character arc...

The movie dork side of me:
- wait, what?
- I'm sorry, that guy did what now? Really?
- yeah, I don't think that's a good char... eh, you get the point.

The movie was... not the worse thing ever. But not any where near the caliber of the other two movies. Or a good movie.

Amy fell asleep, how's that? I was bored. I checked my watch a lot. I felt bad for the following actors having to say tepid dialouge to move along a lackluster story: Patrick Stewart, Halle Berry, Hugh Jackman, That Guy Who Plays Cyclops, Ian McKellen, Famke Janssen, Vinnie Jones (he seemed to like it all okay though), Kelsey Grammer, and everybody else.

It was just... bad. The action wasn't even good. I expected at least the action sequences to be good.

I'm too disjointed to be too coherent, but that's okay, I saw X-Men 3, so I'm in good company.

I know my dreams are of electric sheep...

2006-05-26T11:20:00.000-07:00

This is cool: "25 years on, "Blade Runner" will finally be seen as it should have been from the beginning. After years of legal issues and skirmishes, Warner Bros. has managed to sort out all the problems and is aiming for a September reissue of the remastered "Director's Cut" version, followed by a theatrical release of a version promised to be truly Ridley Scott's final cut reports Variety."

I remember the first time I saw Blade Runner and realized Harrison Ford wasn't just Han Solo. If I didn't have a headache I'd tell you how a parody drawing from Cracked magazine sealed the deal with me understanding that I'd never be an artist, but could be content with having other video professionals mock my shot thumbnails.

What a great flick.

Pseudo Vacation

2006-05-26T11:19:00.000-07:00

I've been kinda out of town. Sorta. And now I'm back. So there.

Oh grandpa, no

2006-05-19T05:07:00.000-07:00

The BEST review of a comic book story ever. Ever.

Hubba hubba!

2006-05-16T09:37:00.000-07:00

Woah. Who's the new girl?

That's right, 2GHz Intel Core Duo power, $1299. Hotcha!

Studio 60

2006-05-15T18:06:00.000-07:00

Next season officially brings us a new Aaron Sorkin/Tommy Schlamme show Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. There's a short promo that ran during the series finale of The West Wing that can be found here.

CNN reports the Sorkin/Schlamme show will go up against the Tina Fey show that's similar, but with Alec Baldwin. So there.

Can we change carriers now? Good.

2006-05-15T17:58:00.000-07:00

Mr. Neil "I Wear My Sunglasses at Night" Gaiman tells a great (well, not great for him at the time) story about getting MCIed by MCI and switching carriers. And he linked to this directory of inexpensive long distance carriers.

Thanks Neil Gaiman, for having to call overseas.

Cinecast confessions

2006-05-13T20:50:00.000-07:00

In honor of the name change of Cinecast and their 100th episode, my Top 5 Movies I Haven't Seen But Really Should:

5. Close Encounters of the Third Kind
4. Raging Bull
3. Animal House
2. Weird Science
1. Lawrence of Arabia

Not for sure that's the order, but that's kinda my priority for seeing 'em. Yeah, and you know what, you go out and watch Brazil or Seven Samurai before you come bitching to me about Raging Bull or Animal House.

And if you're not listening to Cinecast, give it a try. You like movies, and so do these guys. They're smart, professional, and a lot looser than when they started. C'mon, Sam is the production manager for This American Life and you know they gotta hire people that know what they're doing.

If no one's on your canvas/I'm achin' to be

2006-05-13T05:36:00.000-07:00

Okay, Spin called you the most important artist of the decade. You've hit a period of high output in your career, and AOL pays you to perform some of your songs. And of course you don't remember your own words. Because, you know, rock and roll.

Achin' to Be, AOL sessions

Stay for the bit after the credits, come for the acoustic set.

A very doggy Mother's Day

2006-05-12T05:54:00.000-07:00

This isn't my mom, she's Amy's "Mother."

The dogs are sometimes mine. Mostly. I just love their posing.

Lame

2006-05-11T12:38:00.000-07:00

I'm totally that guy posting the links to things and then animal pictures.

Noted.

Joe(y) and Monkey

2006-05-11T12:31:00.000-07:00

Check out Joe and Monkey and remember how much fun it would be if I had a monkey.

I'd have him bathe Puppy Puddles.

Ask a Ninja

2006-05-10T05:37:00.000-07:00

I had CaNinja questions and they have been answered.

I am ninja, you are ninja, but really, he's the ninja.

Blane Check

2006-05-09T05:53:00.000-07:00

Street magician turned "stuntman" still unintentionally mockable? Check.

Newed

2006-05-07T18:51:00.000-07:00

New stuff from the past week:

- edit room construction at work
- free comics from the very excellent free comic book day
- brush for the damn hairiest damn dog on the damn planet
- everyday shoes, a fine pair of New Balances
- socks, also New Balances
- lease on life, thanks to a rowdy bunch of hard cases and raggamuffins

La Petite Ecole

2006-05-05T12:06:00.000-07:00

Digico just launched a new site today for our client The International School of Charlottesville. I think it's pretty spiffy. Jeremy did it.

I am not a remake

2006-05-04T12:07:00.000-07:00

Well, this is a surprise.

There's a part of me that really likes Chris Eccleston doing ANY role, but this... this is like somebody trying to update your first crush. This is somebody reaching into your head saying "I'm going to write over the first moment, that fleeting instant you felt the cosmic tumblers align. Because, you know, I can."

Betrailered Park 3 UPDATED

2006-05-03T09:37:00.000-07:00

Not trying to get in the habit of moving stuff around so it's not reposted up here, but the Sky Captain Betrailered Park is updated with some (slight) coherence and a purty picther.

This Saturday, get some... FREE

2006-05-02T06:19:00.000-07:00

This Saturday is Free Comic Book Day. You can go to your local comic store and get free comics. Could there be a much better holiday than that? FREE COMICS. FREE.

We're talking Simpsons, Star Wars, Conan, Scott Pilgrim, and the best comic you may ever read in the history of ever: Owly.

C'mon, he's a little owl who loves! "These stories will appeal to anyone who has ever experienced loneliness, heartache, true friendship or the sense of achievement one experiences when overcoming obstacles to do the right thing." Go get a copy, give it to a kid. Or your mom. Or your boss. It's Owly. And Free Comic Book Day.

Everything is better on a Mac, even your mom

2006-05-02T06:08:00.000-07:00

Awesome. And true. I wouldn't say it to you if I didn't believe it. Because it's true. Stop living in 1975 and get with the good stuff.

Betrailered Park, part 3: Sky Joey and the World of Tomorrow

2006-05-02T05:49:00.000-07:00

I remember the first time I read Mark Waid's dedication of Kingdom Come, his wildly successful collaboration with Alex Ross. It reads "To Elliot S! Maggin, who gave me x-ray eyes and taught me to fly."

In a book ripe with "Oh. My. God." moments, with iconic images used far and wide in popular culture, small moments with world-destroying consequences ("And when the Seven Thunders had uttered their voices, I was about to write: and I heard a voice from heaven saying unto me, "Seal up those things which the Seven Thunders uttered, and write them not,") Mark Waid pointed to one of the writers who inspired him and said "Blame this guy. He showed me a world of possiblity."

The first time I saw the trailer for Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow I became a boy of twelve. Not yet cynical, not yet "adult." There were ray guns! There were hot dames! There were swashbuckling swashbucklers! And giant robots!

The old man me was astonished by the behind-the-scenes: a guy working alone using his home computers to make a demo to get the money to have work on a feature movie. The sets, entirely virtual. And that feature movie had a "name" cast of people I could tolerate watching kinda!

You know how these go. I saw the movie, and it's "eh." It feels almost too manufactured. The look of the movie, and maybe it's a limitation of the virtual tech melding with the reality, the look is just "off." Not stylistic choices, but the real look of the movie. And that's a hard miss to reconcile.

The direction is kinda off too. I can't blame the guy, Kerry Conran, because he really has accomplished something. It's his first feature, and if anything it's a pretty ambitious movie.

The story is so-so. It's grade B, but that could be okay. You know, if the movie was even more grade B, it might've been okay. There's a joy to the movie, but it also feels manufactured. And, duh, movies are "manufactured" entertainment. But there should be more joy there.

Don't get me wrong, I actually own a copy of Sky Captain on the DVD. I haven't watched the features yet, but a lot of times it's more important to know what went wrong than right, what works and what doesn't. Sky Captain was something that could have been really really good entertainment, but fell short. Sometimes you gotta aim high for that "other world," and, like with everything, the possiblity is failure.

Betrailered Park, Part 2: Eyes Wide Not-So-Funny-on-Purpose

2006-04-24T18:22:00.000-07:00

Stanley Kubrick made, what, a dozen movies? I love 2001. Love it. It's not a movie I can watch every day or anything, but I really love it.

Dr. Strangelove, I could watch probably once a week. The script, the direction, the Peter Sellers.

Hell, even Barry Lydon is beautiful to look at. And in 1999, twelve years after a theatrical release I wasn't old enough to watch, Stanley Kubrick had made a movie with two of the biggest stars in the world: Eyes Wide Shut.

I graduated that year and tried to watch as many movies as I could over the summer with my friends, most of whom also really like movies. And some of us were going to see Eyes Wide Shut.

I gotta admit, I was a little concerned going into the movie. The advance press had been all about the sexual and moral ambiguity of the story, and the leads and supporting cast would be nekked and doin' it. I'm not a prude, but I'm also not a fan of watching the guy from Losing Itfigure out if he wants to have sex with multiple chicks/dudes and cheat on his wife. And the trailers looked like it might be a taut, mysterious, maybe even sexy psychological thriller of... Kubrickian proportions. The trailer gave me enough faith that Kubrick would at least tell an interesting story, even if I did have to watch nekked people with chick friends.

Have you ever been kicked out of a movie? I haven't, but I think with Eyes Wide Shut I came close. The acting, the plot, the "sexy bits," were all hysterically funny. I mean laughable. Out loud. Really loud.

So that's what I did. I laughed through this new "masterpiece" from ol' Stanley. Because it was pretentious and unsexy. Because it was a little too much. Because it made Nicole Kidman unattractive. The filming lasted 400 days, and the movie had to last almost as long.

I get that the movie is a big Kubrick theme of "dehumanizing man." I get what he's saying about our world and menaingless sex and not treating people as objects and primal evil and Hal sings "Daisy." It doesn't mean I liked it.

Free Ice Cream? What's the catch?

2006-04-24T13:18:00.000-07:00

... the catch is I don't live near a Ben & Jerry's. But you might, so eat some free ice cream for me.

Betrailered Park, part 1: For Love of the Crap

2006-04-22T16:31:00.000-07:00

You ever get duped by a movie trailer any more? With all the "MetaCritic" this, and "Cinecast" that I feel like I should know Benchwarmers is wretched and Capote is probably pretty good.

Think back to the good ol' days all those months ago... or so. You see a glimpse of something on TV, you catch the same trailer a few times in the theater the months leading up to the advertised movie's release. And the movie might pique your interest a little, or enough to check want to check it out. And you go to see the movie.

And the movie is crap. Like Benchwarmers bad.

Here, in a ground-breaking, slighty-more-than-links-to-other-website entries, at-least-two-consecutive-pieces, are some of those trailers that, like Ryan's mom, made you believe one thing then turned into Rob Schnieder.

Or "Schnider." Do we even care?

For Love of the Game

Sam Raimi. He was trying to go "mainstream," he was trying to branch out. After striking indie gold with Evil Dead and its subsequent sequels plus perhaps the ultimate (until the Raimi directed Spider-Man) comic book movie Darkman (ironically not a comic book from the start) Raimi made A Simple Plan. A Simple Plan was certainly a stylistic departure, lacking the angles, kinetic camera work and slap-stick of his earlier movies, and one that I really enjoyed. A tense character study of the effects of betrayal and trust with a stark white back drop in a small mid-western town.

Kevin Costner. Harlan Ellison says any story/movie about baseball is really about sons and fathers connecting, and Field of Dreams certainly lends some credence to that theory. Field of Dreams is a classic for a reason: great acting, great script, great direction and original material. Maybe it suffers some now from the "If you build it, they will come" reference, but it still holds up. And Kevin Costner plays the lead in a somewhat non-Costnerian way: really good.

Imagine my delight when I see this trailer: For Love of the Game. It's Sam Raimi AND Kevin Costner in a movie about baseball. A movie, if you've watched the trailer, that's going to be the story of this ball player's life told over the course of his very last game, the last time he has to do what he loves. He's got heartbreak, he's got pathos, there's pain, there's John C. Reily in a supporting role, there's everything-on-the-line... I'm an absolute sucker for "You've got one shot to make this right, don't screw it up."

It's the 'man versus his own mortality' bit with baseball as the framing device! Oh my gosh, put me in the front row, coach, I gotta see this!

Only I shouldn't have. The movie, to be kind, is mediocre. Maybe. Crappy. I mean bad. Like worse than Quick and the Dead. Hell, even Water World is watchable if it's on TNT and you're really tired.

But For Love of the Game is just a big ball of suck wrapped in some decent cinematography and an okay performance by Costner. The script is weak, Kelly Preston isn't used right or can't act, though I can't tell which. It's crappy bad. Like from start to finish it's not good.

For Love of the Game can't be blamed for the marketing people cutting together a trailer that led me to believe one thing (that's the job of the trailer cutting people too, to get my butt in the sea). It can be blamed for plodding along at a snail's pace and giving me too little to care about. Too little to watch.

A half-realized mediocre execution of love/baseball/redemption/Water World story. For Love of the Game is just one of many movies purporting to be one thing, then showing up to the party as another.

Forgot my one line so I just said what I felt

2006-04-17T15:42:00.000-07:00

Covers usually suck, unless you're on Coverville, and that batting average ain't always the best. Especially when it's a band you love.

Judging by the new take Lucero gives my beloved 'Mats b-side If Only You Were Lonely I'd wager I'd like their original material too. Check 'em out if you're in the mood for alt-country with a mix of Johnny Cash, Weakerthans, and The Replacements. Guitars beating the crap out of stuff then telling you about it with heartache. And then beating the crap out of stuff again.

Hi Kiba!

2006-04-17T14:51:00.000-07:00

On top of yesterday having the shit theme, our dryer is kind of dead. Well, not really dead, but after analyzing the dryer, having carefully taken it apart, we decided it wasn't going to be worth repairing.

I am many many things, but a dryer repairman I am not. Now, armed with quite possibly the best website on Earth, I rise to any appliance challenge with honor. And kick-ass pictures of our freakin' Speed Queen Dryer.

I give you: Fix It Now and Samurai Appliance Repair Man.

It's like Car Talk, but for all appliances.

This is why I love the internet. And I love Samurai Appliance Repair Man.

All hear this

2006-04-17T14:32:00.000-07:00

So I just had a hearing exam for a minor thing and I was in a waiting room with one of the most text-book cases of bad parenting. I'm not a psych major (or sign language. Or journalism and public affairs. Or German/CS) but this kid hit all the notes right:

- nuthin' was his fault
- "Hey mom, there's somebody at the door? Did you hear that?" even though we're in a doctor's office
- he knew mom was not going to do any kind of enforcing
- mom had no follow through
- mom kept calling him "baby" even though he was clearly at least three

I loves me some doctor's officing.

Loved Monkey

2006-04-16T20:43:00.000-07:00

So the show Ed was on playing another guy named Some Guy was on VH1 this weekend, starting with the pilot. I'm pretty sure Love Monkey is gone the way of the latest Andy Richter show, and I'm not really missing it.

What I have been missing is stuff on Tivo, and as I was eating dinner (fruit and Doritos as it's Easter and close to midnight) so I watched Letterman from something like March 19th. David Spade got the fast forward, Sarah Vowell got watched, then I left the room for some cookies as musician Teddy Gieger made his TV debut. Only it wasn't.

Teddy played a guy on Love Monkey, a bold new talent discovered on the pilot that allowed Ed to have a fighting chance once he got fired from his job and moved back to Stuckeyville, only this Stuckeyville includes a fat Jason Priestly. And Love Teddy Monkey is a musician who looks and sounds exactly like Teddy and, oh yeah, his debut song is the same song that he played on Letterman.

Weird weird meta advertising.

Next post, no kidding, will be full of shit. About shit. Mostly shit. It's a theme post.